Somersault

I'm thinking about making a new journal. I just want to start over. I don't know, I still have a bit of thinking to do yet. I got back yesterday from Vancouver, it was enjoyable. I wish I lived there instead of Chilliwack. Last night I also went to Cultus Lake, only to be both horrified and disappointed. There were tons of people there, mostly people in their early 20's trying to act all fucking cool. And then of course all the stupid stuck up bitches with their little mini-skirts and purses. OF COURSE they were there. Cultus never used to be like that, it's just not how I remember it. But of course it changed. Everything has to change at some point right? I just really hate change.

So as usual, things have gotten back to boring. I applied at Stream today and hopefully I will get a call back. It seems like I have applied at so many places. I haven't gotten A SINGLE call back. Very depressing. I'm just completely stumped as to what to do. I guess I have to keep fucking applying at places. Like what the fuck. Whatever I'm sick of the whole fucking thing, honestly. All I can do is sit here and just laugh at my situation. This has been the worst summer of all time. This weekend though I'm going up to our cabin in Merritt. We're going to be going swimming at Lac La June (sp?) also. It's so nice there. Very summer-ish. Then after that I'm going to the Harisson Hotel for a couple nights, going swimming, hopefully to the spa, shit like that.

So Terrill keeps reminding me how I am too dependant on my parents and I get 'babied'. I don't really understand fully what he means by that, but I think it's quite true. I need to become more independent and do things on my own. The first step is getting a job, if I ever fucking get one. Then once I get my licence (heh, whenever THAT happens) I can do more things on my own. I'm really going to insist tomorrow that my dad take me to the driving school. Because since I don't have a job I really could be getting that over and done with. Then I can go in for my N. Which is going to provide me so much more freedom. I can't wait.